The Scarlet Numbers 5.10.12

Song Review: “A Few of my Favorite Things”

A few of my Favorite Things is one of the world’s worst songs ever written in history. First of all, don’t get me wrong, this is one of my favorite songs of all time. The melody is catchier than Pudge Rodriguez

“It’s a pretty catchy song.” -Pudge

However, historians have overlooked this merry melody as being factual when in fact it is inaccurate, deceptive, and overall counterproductive to our vocabularies!!!

IF I WERE TO SAY: BOOBS ARE A FEW OF MY FAVORITE THINGS…

That would be correct english.  Because BOOBS are more than one…but less than 3.

Therefore no matter which way you look at it, raindrops on roses, and whiskers on kittens, bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens, Brown paper packages tied up with strings…this is WAY more than a few!!!!

“Wait a minute….that’s more than a few….”

“Ssshhh….no one will ever know!”

No one can disagree this song listed WAY more than a FEW of his favorite things.

THIS IS A FEW…

And if you think there are more than a FEW boobs in this picture you SUCK at English. You can’t just say “These are a few of my favorite things.” after listing FIVE things….I demand this song to be boycotted immediately!!!

If you buy a dictionary and look up the definition of the word ” few.” You might be extremely shocked.

“Oh. My. God! My children are singing what!!!!!” 

Let’s take a moment to look at the definition:

Few:
1. not many but more than one: Few artists live luxuriously.
noun
1. a small number or amount: Send me a few.
2. a special, limited number; the minority: That music appeals to the few.

WOW. That’s exactly the opposite of how the author of “A Few of my Favorite Things” describes it!!!

“I’m gonna call my lawyer and sue this guy’s BUTT off!!!!”

The author of these lyrics deserves to be sued and everyone should be blogging about his blatant misuse of the word “few.” Just think of how damaging these lyrics can be to our worldwide economy!

“That’s more than a FEW!!!!”

 No wonder we’re in a recession! Dont just sit there! Sue him immediately!!!! He has weakened vocabularies and giving our precious children the false impression that a “few” is more a list of 5 or more things…

“It’s not!!!”

 As you can see, this delusional songwriter obviously had no coherent understanding of what the word “few” meant. Maybe this was some kind of subliminal political statement meant to sway the public away from the idea the “a few” is more than it actually is.

I sense a conspiracy here

and I DEMAND the internet to step out and do your part!

Here’s an example of a FEW:

Raindrops on Roses and Whiskers on Kittens.

This is when the song should have ENDED.

But no…

Sue his freaking pants off!!!

More than likely he did this for his own selfish and deceptive reasons. I urge everyone reading this to boycott the song, “A Few of My Favorite Things” because it is poisoning the minds of our youth!

Who knows, maybe the man who wrote “A Few of My Favorite Things” was inspired by THIS BOOK:

Don’t just sit there! Calm your lawyer now!

Sue his butt off before more INNOCENT children are deceived

by this EXTREMELY CATCHY song!!!!

Together we can make a true difference!

Okay now I gotta take a dump,

-Scarlet

5.10.12